Tracy McGrady Wants You to Order a Fork From Your Phone

Posted by on July 6, 2013 in Uncategorized

No, this isn’t an April Fool’s Joke. Back in 2011, Tracy McGrady invested $150,000 into a tech company that thinks the future is ordering a fork from your phone. Yes, Dasdak, “a social commerce platform” company based in Washington D.C., wants a future where we’ve all become so lazy and impatient that we can’t just ask a waiter for another drink. No, we have to order another drink with our phone before we even finish the one we’re slurping. Why, Dasdak, why?

This commercial is bizarre on many levels. And it’s question-begging. First of all, why the hell is someone happily ordering a $5 hotdog? Why is the dude who orders his car from his phone dressed like a stereotypical douchebag? Is it because the founders of this company knew that they would be catering directly to the douchebag market? (Yes.)

I hope and pray that the “utopia” presented in this web commercial never becomes reality. We already have enough prima donnas among us. But hey, if Dasdak (Douchedak?) gets its way, and everyone who drops a utensil in a restaurant immediately orders a new one with his phone, maybe the waitstaff will eventually get so tired of having to stop what they’re doing every two minutes to bring people new forks and knives that they’ll react by running out and stabbing the patrons with forks and knives. And then we’ll all collectively realize what a horrible, horrible mistake using an app like this was.