The Wonderfully Drunken Sounds of the Irish Language
It seems that almost everything Irish is immediately likened to having to do with alcohol or drunkenness. And while most of the time this isn’t very fair, the rest of the time it’s usually true. Now, despite being fiercely proud to be Irish myself, I simply cannot tell a lie. Or actually, I lie a rather lot, but that’s neither here nor there. The important thing here is that the video above consists of a lovely young female newsreader speaking – what I imagine to be some kind of news – entirely in Irish. Go ahead and take a gander at the video and I dare you not to laugh. There’s just something about the language and the way it sounds that is inherently hilarious. What exactly is so funny I cannot seem to pinpoint, however, it is far, far funnier if you imagine the young lady in the video above is absolutely shitfaced. So now go ahead and watch the video again while pretending this is the case. It’s okay, I’ll wait. Much funnier, wasn’t it? Oh the Internet… where absolutely useless, pointless yet still highly entertaining activities such as this can take...
read moreCelebs Read Mean Tweets About Them and It’s Absolutely Hilarious
Let’s get something straight out of the way first and foremost: Jimmy Kimmel is absolutely, positively hilarious and is by far the best late night TV talk show host currently on today. In addition, he has some of the best bits out of any late night TV talk show host ever. And one of those bits – which happen to be one of my personal favorites outside of the ones where they ask people outright, blatant lies (usually about sports) and watch them ramble on and on about said lie just so they can hear themselves talk and seem like they know what they’re talking about – is the celebrity reading mean tweets bit. And just as it sounds, it’s high, high comedy. As anyone who’s ever been on Twitter for even but a few moments can attest, there are a lot of sick, demented and downright mean people constantly tweeting things on the social network. Some of these people are just mean for the sake of being mean in order to make themselves feel better about their own horrible lives, but some tweeters actually make their mean tweeting an art form, as we can see by the vast majority of these “mean” tweets in the video above – read by the likes of Danny McBride, Larry King, Katy Perry and James Van Der Beek (amongst others). Just do yourself a favor and go and watch it, will you? You certainly won’t be sorry – and can then come back and thank me for it in the comments afterwards. So… you’re welcome in...
read moreBrother Pretends to Be Making a Loving Introductory Video of His Sister; Proceeds to Diabolically Push Her Into a Pool
While this may very well be one of the shortest videos we’ve ever posted here at Golden Twist, it’s certainly one of the funniest. Perhaps because of the sister’s complete and utter cluelessness about what’s about to happen to her. And also, perhaps, because she so enthusiastically and innocently exclaims, “Hi!” while waving just before she’s pushed mercilessly into the pool she’s standing beside. Now, the fact that the guy who did this is clearly not the best brother in the universe, you’d be surprised at just HOW much hate he’s gotten since releasing the video. Obviously he’s not going to be winning any “Brother of the Year” awards or anything, but clearly the people who’ve gone a bit over the top in their self-professed hatred of the brother here are either only children or don’t really know the oftentimes love-hate dynamic that can commonly exist between brother and sister. And let’s just be honest with ourselves here – regardless of how awful of a brother this young man may or may not be in real life, this video – by all accounts and when it’s all said and done – is just plain hilarious. End of story. Game over. Hasta la vista, baby. PS: Feel free to press the number 4 on your keyboard in 1-second increments several times in a row. I guarantee you won’t be able to stop for approximately 2-3 minutes at the very least, so proceed with caution!...
read moreToy Soldier Takes a Digger during Disneyland Christmas Parade
What is it about people falling down that’s so very funny? Or what is it about people just being clumsy and causing (mostly) mild physical harm to themselves that’s just so gut-bustingly hilarious? Is it because that — as long as the harm done to the person in question isn’t serious in nature – it’s perfectly okay to laugh because we’re all human and it happens to all of us? Perhaps I’m thinking entirely too deeply into this while asking myself entirely too many questions? Alas, the video above provides us just such a situation. Yet the funny factor of said video is amplified exponentially due to A.) It’s someone in a toy soldier costume and, B.) There’s a half-minute or so build-up to the fall during an otherwise very serious, very festive Disneyland Christmas Parade. Oh, I almost forgot – the costume is designed in such a way whereas it’s almost impossible for the person to get to their own feet by themselves. Indeed, a wonderful, upstanding citizen has to help the toy soldier to their feet due to them essentially being trapped, helpless upon the ground, as if they were a turtle stuck lying on the back of their shell. All in all, it’s just some very funny stuff. I think it may even consist of the very definition of pure comedy – if you could quantify that somehow. Which we can’t, so let’s just point, laugh and be merry, shall we?...
read moreFearless Detroit TV Reporter Eats Cat Food; Hilarity Ensues
It’s official: Charlie LeDuff is, in fact, the man. A reporter for Fox News 2, a Detroit affiliates, Charlie LeDuff is infamous for providing zany, entertaining, yet still hard-hitting reporting for the channel’s news program. And as you can clearly tell from the video above, Mr. LeDuff is in sore, sore need of his own television show. In the midst of a growing scandal, Charlie investigates reports that the Wayne County government was trying to make cuts to the Meals On Wheels program – a program that actually feeds the county’s retired elderly community. To prove his point that the citizens are incredibly dissatisfied with the current state of the meals, Charlie actually gets an older gentleman suffering from multiple sclerosis to try out a can of cat food after (enthusiastically) trying it for himself. Even more surprising, the older gentleman actually exclaims it may very well be better than what he’s normally served. And Charlie… well, Charlie just appears entirely too delighted by the cat foods taste, which he proclaims is, “Not BAD!” Charlie then wheels the older gentleman across an incredibly busy interstate to procure him a, “Nice meal,” of Arby’s. Mmmm… Arby’s! Anyway, what’s the moral of this story? Well, it’s quite simple: The TV news-world – and generally just the TV world in general actually — needs more Charlie LeDuff’s. Heck, the world needs more Charlie LeDuff’s. He is, indeed, an inspiration to us all. Now who wants to go halfsies on some Meow...
read moreThe True Secret to Happiness? Stupidity!
“It’s no secret that morons and idiots are the majority of the world’s population. They’re not suddenly going to get smarter or start acting reasonably. It’s YOU who will have to change.” So says the intelligently accented, reassuringly goateed spokesman for a revolutionary new way to get happy and stay happy: a lowered IQ in pill form! Lower your IQ by 10, 30, or 50 IQ points in just one night! Make it so low that you’ll want to immediately run out and sing with goats. Now everything is hunky dory. Side effects may include racism and homophobia, but at least you won’t be alone. A sly and nasty condemnation of, well, most people. Ouch....
read moreMost Contagious Laugh EVAR
This famous audio recording of a man calling in late for work might be completely staged, or it might be genuine, but either way, there is no denying this redneck-accented poet’s ability to make you laugh. His word choices are just about as colorful as you can get as he describes for his boss, in real time, a minor car accident happening right in front of him — right down to the type of bible an old lady is hitting some guy with. Men’s rights advocates might be upset about the event described in this video, and understandably so, but if you can look past that and just enjoy the pure delight of this man’s laugh, his narration is just comedy gold, folks. As it should be. The name of this blog is GoldenTwist after...
read moreGordon Ramsey: Man, Myth… Badass
Chuck Norris who? As much hate as Gordon Ramsey gets, you’ve got to give the guy credit. He only absolutely loses his mind and screams at people — while popping several blood vessels in his neck and forehead in the process — when they absolutely, positively deserve it. Like, if you try and serve up a practically rare steak to someone, why shouldn’t you get screamed at like the moron you are? Someone could die from that kind of mistake. Did you read that correctly? Someone could DIE! Anyway, in the video above, we see Gordon Ramsey at his finest. Vintage Gordon Ramsey even, dishing out some good old fashioned, common sense, verbal berating justice. And it’s absolutely awesome. Although, I imagine if you were on the receiving end of such tirades it would be a bit unnerving and uncomfortable, but hey, just don’t try and serve someone a completely raw steak and you should be all...
read moreNow This is How You Make An Entrance!
In this day and age, it almost seems like we’ve drifted away from seemingly important things like self-respect, proper hygiene — and, perhaps most importantly — making a frigging kickass entrance. Thankfully, Sam Rockwell is trying to bring this seemingly extinct pastime back in STYLE, and he does it on the Jimmy Fallon (blech!) show. As you can see above, he’s pretty damn good at dancing, but it’s really less of that and more of the principle if you get what I’m saying. So, if you absolutely, positively SUCK at dancing (like me!) don’t fret, my friend. You can still make a striking and poignant entrance anywhere you go by just pretending like you know how to dance. Either that, or you can carry a boombox with you and blast the Ghostbusters II theme song. Your choice,...
read moreOh To Be Young…
Seriously, how often do you wish you were 4 years old again? I don’t know if it’s just because I’m super weird (actually, this is most likely the case) or not, but I find myself reminiscing that I was back in second or third grade again ALL the time. Maybe it’s because I have two kids (aged 5 and 2, at the moment) or maybe it’s just because I really, REALLY loved the chocolate milks you could pick at lunch time… I don’t know. Anywho, all this isn’t important. What IS important is that in the video above, you’ll once again remember the very essence of what it was like to be young, innocent and not have a care in the world outside of having to do 10 addition questions for your math homework. Because, after all… “A B C D E F… Cookie...
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